“Harry, you need your strength,” said Seamus Finnigan. “Seekers are always the ones who get clobbered by the other team.”

There are some things you can’t share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them.

Draco, hot, invites Harry to meet him in the castle at night. For strictly violent reasons. This is not a date.

Snape shows up and Harry is all “why are you so obsessed with me?”

Sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort. He said me haffi sort, sort, sort, sort, sort, sort.